The Log Date: A Critical Review of the Traditions and Forms of Dating at Williams College – Quentin Cohan

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Not without reason, the Log’s grand re-opening in November was accompanied with much fanfare and to-do. As great an (re-) addition as this is to the vibrant Williams College community, this researcher is not left without his worries. The primary one of these stemming from confusion as to where in the incredibly delicate Williams College Dating Hierarchy the, newly relevant, Log Date fits.
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On Feminism, from the Desk of the Ghost of Ephraim Williams

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Verily, it is with great chagrin that I find myself once again rising from my dusty tomb ‘neath the rolling green pastures of Williamstowne. While I had, as always, set the alarm-clocke to end my astral slumber for October the 31th, the highly celebrated holiday known in my time as All’s Hallow’s Eve–an occasion of great revelry for me as I harass, possess and otherwise torment young children engaged in their petty, and, may I say indulgent, tradition of harvesting sugars–I instead awoke early, risen by the clamor and fervor over the arranged visit of a Ms. Venker, a correspondent of the news amalgamation syndicate known as Foxxe. Read more

New Committee Formed to Review Musical Performances – Anonymous

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In light of the recent controversy on Facebook regarding the cultural and racial politics of the music of Asian-American rappers Awkwafina and Dumbfoundead, both scheduled to perform in Goodrich Hall on the 17th of April as part of the upcoming REACH Conference, the Office of Student Life announced this morning that all scheduled performances by visiting artists would be indefinitely suspended. In an email addressed to the student body, OSL declared that all musical events at the college have been put on hiatus pending the creation and subsequent approval of a new subcommittee, which will be responsible for reviewing every proposed musician. Among the responsibilities of the new Subcommittee for Investigations Leading to Ending Needless Cultural Exploitation are in-depth analyses of each artist’s lyrics, genre, musical style, affected accents, Twitter and Facebook posts, memoirs, tabloid interviews, and subconscious attitudes. … Read more

End of the Year Committee Reports, 1849 – Colin Adams, Thomas T. Read Professor of Mathematics

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The Faculty Steering Committee

This year, the Steering Committee agonized over the question of whether the College should strive to become a first rank research university, or whether it should continue to remain a college with a single faculty member, a single student and a single classroom consisting of one log. Although no conclusion has been reached, Mark Hopkins suggested that with God’s grace, we will find a way out of this logjam. Perhaps some other alternative will present itself, and we will discover the true nature of Williams College. … Read more

Survey Reveals CSS Officers Tired of Being Treated Like “Frankensteins” – Quentin Cohan

HOPKINS HALL – A recent anonymous survey of the Williams College Safety and Security staff revealed that a number of the crew feel misunderstood by the student body due to the misinformed impression that when they arrive at parties they are there to break them up, when they are actually there “because we just want to kickback and have a good time. We were kids once too after all.” … Read more

CC Candidates Promise to Give “Face to the Faceless” – Quentin Cohan

Eschewing standard rhetoric, College Council Co-Presidential Candidates Taylor Swanson ’16 and Avery Bluth ’16 presented their platform at this week’s presidential debate in which they promised to give a “face to the faceless” students on campus. “Every year somebody promises to give a voice to the voiceless on campus, but we wanted to distance ourselves from that tired platform,” Swanson said in an interview after the debate, “we wanted to do something different, and this is a important issue.”Read more

Spring Street Jews – Quentin Cohan

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Monday 2-23-15

11:42 a.m. Pappa Charlie’s: Security was called to escort out of the deli a student who was accosting the staff over an issue with the patron’s breakfast sandwich. The student had ordered a bagel with nova lox and cream cheese, but received gravlax instead. The server claimed the salmon was nova, but the student said his palette was very refined and could detect otherwise. … Read more